The internet has created incredible opportunities for children to learn, socialise and explore their interests. Unfortunately, it has also created new ways for adults with harmful intentions to approach children.
Online predators don’t necessarily look or behave like the stereotypical “stranger on the internet”. They can use fake profiles, pretend to be younger than they are, join communities where children spend time and gradually build relationships with their targets.
This process can be known as online grooming.
Understanding how grooming works is one of the most important things parents can do to help protect their children.
What Is Online Grooming?
Grooming occurs when someone builds a relationship with a child with the intention of exploiting or abusing them.
It can happen through:
- Social media
- Messaging applications
- Online gaming
- Gaming chats
- Community forums
- Livestreaming platforms
- Dating or social applications
The predator may initially appear friendly and harmless. They might share the child’s interests, compliment them, offer advice or simply become someone the child believes they can trust.
Over time, the relationship can become increasingly inappropriate.
Why Predators Build Trust First
A predator doesn’t necessarily begin by asking a child for something inappropriate. Instead, they may gradually establish trust.
They could:
- Regularly message the child
- Remember personal details
- Give compliments
- Pretend to have similar problems
- Offer gifts or digital items
- Encourage secrecy
- Make the child feel special
- Gradually introduce sexual conversations
The child may genuinely believe they are communicating with a friend. That is why simply telling children “don’t talk to strangers” isn’t always enough. The person may no longer feel like a stranger.
What Is Sexual Extortion?
Sexual extortion, often called sextortion, occurs when someone threatens to release sexual or intimate material unless the victim provides money, additional images, sexual content or something else the perpetrator wants.
A child might initially send an image voluntarily after being manipulated or pressured. The predator then uses that image as leverage.
The threats may become increasingly frightening:
“Send me another picture or I’ll show everyone.”
“Give me money or I’ll send this to your school.”
The child may feel trapped.
Why Children Often Don’t Tell Their Parents
This is one of the most important things parents need to understand. A child experiencing sextortion may be terrified that their parents will be angry with them.
They may think:
- “I’m going to get into trouble.”
- “My parents will take my phone away.”
- “Everyone is going to see it.”
- “This is my fault.”
- “There’s nothing anyone can do.”
That fear can cause children to remain silent, allowing the perpetrator to continue manipulating them. Parents should make it very clear that their child can come to them without fear of punishment.
What Parents Should Teach Their Children
Children should understand that:
They never owe anyone a photograph.
Not because someone says they love them. Not because someone threatens them. Not because they have already sent something. And not because someone claims to be their boyfriend, girlfriend or online friend.
They should also understand that if someone threatens them, giving the person more material or money does not necessarily make the threats stop.
If Your Child Is Being Sextorted
Parents should try to remain calm. The most important thing is to support the child and prevent the situation from escalating.
Consider:
- Saving evidence
- Recording usernames and account information
- Blocking the perpetrator where appropriate
- Reporting the account to the platform
- Seeking assistance from relevant authorities
- Securing the child’s online accounts
- Changing compromised passwords
- Enabling MFA
Most importantly, don’t blame the child.
The person exploiting them is responsible for the abuse.
Final Thoughts
Children don’t need to understand every technical aspect of online predators to protect themselves. They need to understand boundaries, recognise manipulation and know that asking an adult for help will never get them into trouble. The strongest protection a parent can provide isn’t constant surveillance.
It is trust, communication and education.
This post was written by AI and reviewed for quality and accuracy by a real human.
